Subscribe to RSS  |  Advertise with us
site logo
  • HOME
  • ONLINE CONTENT
    • FICTION
    • POETRY
    • ART
  • PODCAST
  • SUBMIT
  • CONTACT
  • SHOP
Homepage > Online Content > Poetry > Poetry: Down with Democracy!
July 15, 2021  |  By . In Poetry

Poetry: Down with Democracy!

cropped-favicon-1.png

Down with Democracy! By Wortley Clutterbuck

 

Are not fools and stupid beings a majority in the world, and ought they not to have their
representative?
— Honoré de Balzac, Le Député d’Arcis.

There’s been some muttering I’ve heard
about a goverance preferred;
it seems the lower classes want
democracy, with all its cant.

The speeches make it sound real grand
in language stark to understand;
there’s promises of something free
that goes to them, taken from me.

Now, despotism, people demn —
at least until explained to them;
but there’s issues so delicate
you can’t trust an electorate.

The population’s prejudiced,
distracted, as well hedonist;
the great unwashed can’t understand
that government is better planned.

The average chuff’s illiterate —
he’d hurt himself with a ballot;
‘why bother with democracy
if you can’t vote yourself money?’

Consulting ikons and tea-leaves,
they’ll eeny-meeny between thieves;
since elements rob themselves blind,
why should it surprise in mankind?¹

The people who want parliament
are out to shift the ignorant;
the problem with democracy
is when the turn-out out-votes me.

The riff-raff and the menials
should leave it up to us nobles;
aristocrats, we’ll make the law
and peasants, you may thank us all.

Sure, populism’s pretty quaint
and everyone’s got some complaint;
it’s effortless to finger-point
but lots more work to run this joint.

I ask you how low can they stoop
to call the King a nincompoop?;
sure, sovereigns make a few boo-boos
but aren’t those famines now old news?

These knaves who want equality
deserve naught but the pillory;
muck-rakers’ heads should be on blocks —
democracy’s a scurvy pox.

The best technique, I would confide,
to win is join the winning side;
who needs those scrofulous cut-throats —
who counts are those who count the votes.

Who needs their tedious ‘fair play,’
they’d end up despots anyway;
it’s ‘liberty!’ ‘til they prevail
then they’ll oppress the curst canaille.

We’ll not have mobs or street dissent —
all power to the 1%;
who cares what the great unwashed likes —
it’s their or our heads up on pikes!

Democracy’s the latest thing —
It’s dernier cri to be left-wing;
but they’ll be sorry, soon enough,
when they elect some dumb-ass chuff.

1. “Since elements themselves do rob each other,
and Phoebe for her light doth rob her brother,
what ist in man, one man to rob another?”
—Richard Brome, The City Wit, act IV, sc. I.


Wortley Clutterbuck, esq., is the composer of Poèmes Déplorables and Bedtime Stories, each available gratis through soundcloud. Text publications include Quadrant (Australia), Reed (USA) and (upcoming) Stand (UK).

Down with Democracy poetry straylight Wortley Clutterbuck

Article by .

Previous StoryPoetry: Master and Pupil
Next StoryPoetry: Dances

Related Articles:

  • NovellaSectionsCover-WebCover
    Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Nine Part Two by Victor Kreuiter
  • NovellaSectionsCover-WebCover
    Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Eight Part Two by Victor Kreuiter

SEARCH

The Pub

RECENT POSTS

  • Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Ten by Victor Kreuiter June 2, 2025
  • Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Nine Part Two by Victor Kreuiter May 26, 2025
  • Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Nine Part One by Victor Kreuiter May 19, 2025
  • Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Eight Part Two by Victor Kreuiter May 12, 2025
  • Fiction: Vanessa Hoffman’s Conversations on Life and Living and Death and Dying: Section Eight Part One by Victor Kreuiter May 5, 2025

CALENDAR

June 2025
M T W T F S S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30  
« May    
Straylight Literary Magazine. ©2019. All Rights Reserved